I envy my friends’ families. All of their parents supports and motivates them for O levels whereas mine don’t. Instead, all of you only say that I’m stupid and I’ll never make it for a Polytechnic. Y’all did not even came forward and ask me about my studies, y’all didn’t ask how am I coping with it, y’all only ask about my results.

If I fail my papers, y’all will scold me for being stupid and wasting your money, but have you ever thought about MY feelings? I know I’m using your money, I don’t wish to either. But I’m only 17 and still schooling. How do you expect ME to EARN MONEY?

Especially you, DAD, you don’t even fucking know when are my prelims, you don’t even know when I’m getting my Mother Tongue results, you don’t even know when I’m needed to submit my Design and Technology coursework, and I expected that you don’t even know what the fuck is Design and Technology, you can’t see that I’m staying up late to do my work is because I don’t have a fucking study table and I can’t do my work when your DARLING BABY is at home.

Fuck this shit, you think it’s easy to take O levels? THEN WHY DON’T I FUCKING SEE YOUR RESULTS? You don’t even fucking care about mine, in your head, I’m already labeled a “failure” there. I can’t fucking do anything well. Parents should be supportive, not demoralizing your child and say that she’s stupid? Even Uncle motivates me.

YOU DON’T FUCKING CARE ABOUT MY HARD WORK. YOU THINK THAT I DON’T WANT TO WAKE UP EARLY? YOU THINK I WANT TO WASTE YOUR MONEY? I DON’T WANT TO WASTE MY EFFORT EITHER, BUT IT’S JUST SO HARD WHEN YOUR FAMILY DOESN’T SUPPORTS YOU IN ANYTHING AND JUST FUCKING SCREAM AT YOU FOR BEING STUPID. YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW I FUCKING FEEL.